Shut that door shut that door
It's freezing cold in here
Shut that door shut that door
I'm feeling rather queer
I haven't felt myself all day
Cause I've been all alone
So come inside and shut that door
And make yourself at home.

I got Laryngitis my throat was very sore
Went to see my Doctor his wife answered the door
I whispered is the Doctor in my voice was very hoarse
She whispered no and pulled me in
And promptly shut that door

Shut that door shut that door
It's freezing cold in here
Shut that door shut that door
I'm feeling rather queer
I haven't felt myself all day
Cause I've been all alone
So come inside and shut that door
And make yourself at home.

I'm worn out wish I could lie down for a minute

The Doctor he came in and said my temprature was high
He said now take off all your clothes there's no need to be shy
I stood there wearing just a smile the room was quite a temp
Don't know where the draft came from but I know where it went

Shut that door shut that door
It's freezing cold in here
Shut that door shut that door
I'm feeling rather queer
I haven't felt myself all day
Cause I've been all alone
So come inside and shut that door
And make yourself at home.

Just look at the muck on this microphone stand

Feeling ill the other night I dreamt I went to heaven
Joined the queue at the pearly gates that stretched from there to Devon
St Peter called out hurry inside I'm frozen to the core
Then promptly realised I was booked downstairs and promptly shut that door

Shut that door shut that door
It's freezing cold in here
Shut that door shut that door
I'm feeling rather queer
I haven't felt myself all day
Cause I've been all alone
So come inside and shut that door
And make yourself at home.

I going so giddy
Oh dear oh dear I've got one of my funny turns
Shall I get a drop of brandy
Get me some brand
And don't guzzle it
Oh dear all my legs have gone to water
And my backs killing me again.....

